Insane fangirls and LotR characters who have been pulled apart by fangirls say the darndest things!
Home
I hate these words!
Internet Bumper Stickers
Icons
Comics
Parodies
Wolfenstein
OCs
crittersesss
A Lesson on American History
Dumb unRealistic Eerie-Ass iMages
Alternate LotR scenes and quotes
Who's behind this???
Middle-Earth Jokes
Captions
Purrsunaulyti Test!
Better Places
Learn Aquarian

What you are about to read is meant to amuse you and quite possibly freak you out. Do not attempt to adjust your computer.

They are quotes and scenes from The Fellowship of the Ring- well, sorta.

These were all created by best friend whom I refer to as- on the internet, mostly- Suki. Theyre more like Fellowship quotes that should have been, according to her. Copy these and claim them as your own, and youll have two black high-heeled boots up your bum.

I realize the bright pink words on the black background is obnoxious and it cant be good for the eyes, but I like the way it looks, (when I see it, not so much as when I stare at it) so no, I wont change it. If its a pain for you, you can A) Copy it onto some sort of word-ish program on your computer, or B) Wait for me to post it on fanfiction.net (my username is GirlMeowth) on their nice-white-background-black-text-easy-on-the-eyes-site. Also, I suppose most of this goes for the rest of the site. Not necessarily each word, though. Im not going to put all my surveys in my profile section onto fanfiction.net. The only way Id be able to do that is if I put them all in my biography, and I dont want to waste peoples time making them scroll through all that crap.

*Thinks* Oh, like I havent been wasting everyones time rambling and keeping them from reading the feature presentation. Well, here they are.

Mel- *Picks up arrows and bow and shoots them at Boromir, but they hit the door* Damb!  *Throws down arrows and bow, then stomps off*
Gimli- What was that!?
Boromir- P.M.S.
Gimli- Oh.

Galadriel- Welcome to Lothlorien.
Mel and Cris- *Run up and tackle Galadriel* Auntie!
All- Auntie?
Girls- Yep.  Auntie Galadriel.
Galadriel- I taught them everything I know.  Seeing as how Cris is obsessed with my son-in-law.  Show them, girls.
Cris and Mel- *Do scary green thing*
All- *Run away*

Cris and Mel- *Single handed-Lee kill all the orcs with Force powers and light sabers*
Legolas- *To Mel* I love you!  *Grabs her and they start making out*
Elrond- *To Cris* I love you!  *Grabs her and they make out*
Sam- *To Frodo* I-
Frodo- DON'T even think about it!
*Elrond and Cris stop making out*
Aragorn- Elrond, where did you come from?
Elrond- Well, Aragorn, when two elves love each other very much
Aragorn- No I mean why are you here?
Elrond- Oh.  To make out with Cris, AND get my tiara back.  *Holds out hand*
Cris- *Sigh* Fine. *Gives tiara back*
Elrond- Thanks. *Kiss* Bye. *He disappears*
All- Weird.

*Boromir dies*
Aragorn- Noooo!  He's dead.
Cris- *Goes to Boromir and listens to his heart* I've seen worse.
Aragorn- Huh?
Mel- *Walks by Cris* Ya see Boromir here is only mostly-dead.  There's a difference between all-dead and mostly-dead.  With all-dead there's only one thing you can do
Aragorn- What's that?
Cris- Go through his pockets and look for loose change.  But this we can fix.
Aragorn- How!?
Mel- YO!  GirlMeowth!
GM- What!?  Everytime I get in the shower, there's a ring at the story.
Cris- Can you fix Boromir?  Please?
GM- Why?  He tried to take The Ring.
Cris- 'Cause he tired to save Merry and Pippin.
Mel- And he is kind of cute.
Legolas- Hey!  If that's the way you feel *Turns he is back on Mel*
Mel- In a non-hottie-elf way!
Lego- Okay. *They make out*
Cris- Riiiight.  *To GM* And he likes, no, LOVES cats!
GM- Well, when you put it that way, *She brings him back to life* There.  Bye!
*Boromir stands up*
Cris- It's alive!  It's alive!  Bwahahaha!

Haldir- A dwarf breaths so loudly we could have shot him in the dark.
Cris- And your nose is so big I could shoot it from a mile away.

*At Galadriel's Mirror*
Mel- Can I look, Auntie?
Galadriel- Sure.
Mel- *Looks in* It's Lego and me getting married!  Oh, look, Gimli's the flower girl!
All- *Smack foreheads*

*Cave Troll enters*
CT- Grrr!  Roar!
Cris- Rooaarr!
CT- RRROOOAAARRR!!!
Cris- You're good.
Mel- Now listen here Cave Troll.  If you be good, I'll take off that nasty old collar, and you can be free.
CT- *Acts like a puppy dog*
Mel- *Takes off collar* Go get the orcs, boy!  Go on!
*He squashes all the orcs then runs off.*
Mel- *Sniff* Good-bye, Fluffy.
Aragorn- Getting afraid now.

Galadriel- If there is anything you need while you stay, just ask and you will receive it.
Pippin- May I have some pints?
Sam- Male strippers?
Merry- Frodo's very scary?  Err, I mean Buckleberry Ferry?
Frodo- Anti-depressant?
Aragorn- Soap and a hot bath?
Gimli- All your hair?
Boromir- Loud music so you won't make voices in my head?
Lego- *Stops making out with Mel for a second* Privacy.
Mel- Yea, what he said.  *Continuing*
Cris- Aragorn's necklace?
Galadriel- *Smacks forehead.*

*The crebain fly over.*
Lego- Hide!!
*Everyone gets behind some rocks except Gimli.*
Gimli- Ahhhhh!  I've been hit!
*Everyone rushes out just to find a bird-crap-covered Gimli.*
All- ..........HAHAHAHAHAHA!

*On the Bridge*
Gimli- Nobody tosses a dwarf!
Cris- *To Aragorn* Yea, I tried it once and my back's never been the same.

Gandalf- Fool of a Took!  Through yourself in next time and rid us of your stupidity!
Cris- Hey, if it's stupidity you want to get rid of...
Mel- And that horrible dwarf smell...
*They push Gimli in.*
Cris- *Dusts hands* That's that.
Mel- It smells better in here already.

*Merry and Pippin are throwing rocks at the water.*
Aragorn- Do not disturd the water.
*There's a tinkling noise; everyone turns and looks in that direction.*
Sam- *Has back turned to everyone* Hehehehe.

Gimli- *Out of the blue* He have any of you guys ever put ladies' underwear on your head, then run around the house singing Y.M.C.A.?
All- .........
Gimli- Me neither.  Hehehe.

Gandalf- Sam, be a good boy and fill my pipe.
Sam- *Goes to cabinet and pulls out a can* Let's see. G-U-N-P-O-W-D-E-R.  That spells pipeweed!  *Fills pip till it's overflowing* Her ya go, Gandalf.
Gandalf- Thank you, Sam.  *Lights match and puts it near pipe*
GirlMeowth- We interrupt this parody to say: Hurting old guys is not my bag, so I leave you to use you imagination now.  Thank you and good night.

*Gandalf falls into shadow and everybody starts to cry.*
Cris- Stop yer whining!  Gandalf's main character, so he can't be dead!
Frodo- Then let's go get him!
Cris- Frodo, I've read the Two Towers.  Do you want to see a naked Gandalf?
Frodo- NO!!!!  *Tries to gouge out eyes*
Cris- Then trust me, you don't want to save him.

Gimli- Ahhhhhhhhh!
All- What!?
*Gimli walks over.*
Gimli- Someone washed and cut my hair!
All- *Gasp*!
Gimli- Then they sprayed air freshener on me and my clothes!
All- NO!
Gimli- And I want to know who did it!
All- *Look at Cris and Mel*
Cris and Mel- *In radioactive suit with a mountain of empty cleaning products behind them* What?

*At the bridge*
Lego- *Jumps over gap* Gandalf, you're next!
Cris- No way!  A man of Gandy's age should NOT be jumping over fiery pits.
Mel- Or kings and stewards of Gondor.
Cris- Or little halflings.  *Picks up Sam and Pippin*
Mel- *Picks up Frodo and Merry* After you, Cris.
Cris- No, no.  I insist, after you, Mel.
Mel- I have an idea.  Let's go together.
Cris- Splendid.
*They walk over the gap, put the hobbits down, walk back over, Cris picks up Aragorn, Mel- Boromir, they walks back over, put them down, go back, and both carry Gandalf over.*
All- O_o......  HOW?
Girls- We are Elves and we know the Author.  *Look skyward* Thanks!
GirlMeowth- No prob!
Gimli- What about me?
Girls- Walk across.  We're not touching you.
Gimli- *Whimpers, but walks across and makes it*
Mel- Good job!  *Pushes him off*
Cris- If you hadn't done it, I would have.

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!