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*Sam and Frodo are walking in a field.*
Frodo- *Gets whacked
with a brown, not round ball... the name escapes me.* Ow!
Cris- *Takes off helmet* Oops, sorry. Wrong field.
*Sam and
Frodo were in a field with a scarecrow and a car in the background and all that other good schtuff.*
Sam- I think the car
and scarecrow thing happened a while before.
Cris- Hey, whos doing the narrating, you, or narrator?
Sam- I should! I
at least know what's going on!
Mel- You!? Mister Hasn't Even Walked Passed the Field!? Ha!
*Frodo gets extremely bored
of this and walks away.*
Sam- Mister Frodo!?
*Frodo comes back.*
Frodo- Zuh?
Sam- I thought Id' lost you!
Frodo-
I was gonna for two seconds!
Sam- Oh. Um. Cool... Well, this is boring...
Frodo- Merry and Pippin should be here in
5... 4... 3... 2... 1!
*SLAM!*
Pippin- It's Grodo Saggins and Bamwise Famgee!
Merry- No, you fool! It's Brodo Faggins
and Gamwise Samgee!
Frodo- No, no, no! We're Srodo Gaggins and Famwise Bamgee!
Sam- Nah-uh! We're Bonny and Clyde!
Other
three- Oh, okay.
Merry- Wait, we're s'posed to be running from Farmer Maggot! He was chasing us cos we stole all this schitt
from him!
Sam- *Looks at vegetables Merry and Pippin are holding* You got this from Farmer Maggot's crop!
Mel- Duh.
Sam-
*Cries* Why are you so mean to me!?
Pippin- Well, all we got was some carrots! *They are running now, BTW*
Merry- Yes.
Pippin-
And some mushrooms!
Merry- Yes Pip.
Pippin- And his daughter.
Merry- Yes, Pippin! My point is, he's clearly being
a douche bag!
Frodo- Um, I don't think thats what you're s'posed to say.
Merry- Well, he is.
*They fall off something.*
Sam-
Trust a Trandybuck and a Book!
Merry- *Kicks Sam in the head* We're Kcubydnarb and Koot!
Frodo- Hey, don't kick Sam!
*Kicks Merry in the head*
Sam- You love me! You really love me! *Latches onto Frodo*
Frodo- Hey! Getoff! *Kicks Sam
in the head*
Pippin- *Wants to be included in the head kicking, so he starts kicking a ringwraith in the head that has
come up*
Frodo- I think you shouldn't do that...
*Ringwraith is now getting very angry*
Frodo- STOP DOING THAT!
*Bonny,
Clyde, Kcubydnarb and Koot dive under tree.*
Ringwraith- *Sniff, sniff*
Pippin- What is he, a dog or something!?
Ringwraith-
Hey, you think it's easy having a cold? I think I'm coming down with laryngitis, too!
Merry- Well, that explains a lot!
Ringwraith-
Hang on. I'm gonna go get a cough drop. I'll be back to take the ring from you.
Hobbits- Okay.
*The hobbits get chased
around later.*
Frodo- Me and Sam-
Cris- Sam and I.
Frodo- *Rolls cute, adorable, big, blue, adorable eyes* Sam and
I... gotta go to Bree.
Merry- My uncle's very hairy!
Mel- What?
Merry- Buckleberry ferry. Follow me!
Mel- Oh...
*And
they all go to Bree on their raft thingy and they all go up to ze gate.*
Guard dude- Who is it?
*No answer*
Guard-
Who IS it?
*Theres no answer*
Guard- WHO IS IT!?
*Theres no answer!*
Guard- *Opens door* Just as I suspected.
Four hobbits stalked by two insane elven girls and only one ring. Oh man, I hate it when I'm right.
*Hobbits go to inn
called the Prancing Pony*
Butterbur- I can get you some hobbit-sized rooms.
Frodo- Has Gandalf been here?
Butterbur-
Clown with pet possum?
Frodo- No.
Butterbur- Lawyer? Pencil? Xylophone? Swan?
Frodo- Noooo.
Butterbur- Red and
purple-clad villain with the power to bend metal?
Frodo- Yes, wait- no.
Butterbur- Wizard with long beard and pointy
hat?
Frodo- Yes!
Butterbur- Haven't seen him for a while.
Frodo- &%^$.
*Dude in pony costume comes up to Frodo*
Pony
dude- Heya there! I'm Pete the Prancing Pony! What's your name?
Frodo- *Scared out of his wits* Bonny- no, Clyde- no, Frodo
Baggins- no, Barbara Walters.
Pony dude- Well, Barbara, we've just gotten word that today's your birthday!
Frodo- No,
you must've gotten your facts mixed-
*Before he can protest, curtains on a stage open up, and a robot pony, duck-chicken-thingy,
dwarf, and a God-knows-what start singing some screwy rendition of Happy Birthday to you, slightly in a pop style*
Cris
and Mel- Make it stop... Make it stooooooooop...
*The hobbits and girls make it to a table.*
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